Abstinent woman creates dating app for people who don’t want to have sex, says God ‘called’ to her
A woman has created a dating app solely for people who aren’t having sex, after she said God ‘called to her’ and asked her to make it.
Shakia Seabrook, 33, from Tampa, Florida, started ‘The Sexless Tribe’ last year as a hub for people who are sexually abstinent – a community she thought was being underrepresented.
The entrepreneur, who made the decision to be abstinent when she was 13 years old, explained that it’s more than just a dating app – but that it’s also a place where abstinent people can ‘come together and connect.’
Per its website, The Sexless Tribe App ‘makes it easy for sexually abstinent people to access abstinence resources, find accountability partners, form friendships, and make romantic connections.’
Shakia, who said it was her ‘calling’ to make the app, uses the platform to give its 8,000 subscribers ‘encouraging messages’ and ‘late-night check-ins,’ and to remind them that if ‘they’re having a little itch, they can go to the app and listen to a song or a video or a podcast.’
‘This lifestyle isn’t talked about enough. It’s not visible enough,’ said Shakia.
‘There’s not space enough for people to come together and get the help they desire to be successful in living this lifestyle, so I arose to the challenge.’
A woman has created a dating app solely for people who aren’t having sex after she said God ‘called to her’ and asked her to make it
Shakia Seabrook, 33, from Tampa, Florida, started ‘The Sexless Tribe’ as a hub for people who are sexually abstinent – a community she thought was being underrepresented
Per its website, The Sexless Tribe App ‘makes it easy for sexually abstinent people to access abstinence resources, find accountability partners, and make romantic connections’
The entrepreneur explained that it’s more than just a dating app – but that it’s also a place where abstinent people can ‘come together and connect’
Shakia explained that although she wasn’t ‘super passionate’ about abstinence at first, she decided to go ‘full throttle’ with the app after she said she realized it was what God wanted of her.
‘God just kept showing me this is what I’m calling you to do,’ she said.
‘I pushed back against it because it wasn’t a topic that I was super passionate about. In 2020, I finally gave God my yes and went full throttle from then on out.
‘I started [with] T-shirts and then I realized it wasn’t enough because people wanted community.
‘I came across someone that had created an app and I was like that’s what we need: we need a home, we need a place that we can come together and connect.’
The app consists of two parts: a resource space for abstinence-based material and TST social – a community space where users can create profiles and interact.
‘In September 2020, I created the community space,’ Shakia said.
‘Then, I realized that wasn’t enough because people were still DMing me asking [if] I knew any books, or podcast, or YouTube channels about abstinence.
‘I realized that they also needed resources and in the beginning of this year I created the resources part of the app and now it’s one big hub.
‘There are events that are hosted in the app every month via Zoom. Every day they get an encouraging quote to their phone, and they get a late-night check-in just to hold them accountable.
‘I tell them at night – maybe you’re having a little itch, maybe you need to go to the app and listen to a song or a video or a podcast.’
Though the app is still in beta mode, Shakia said there have been over 8,000 downloads for both parts already, and people use them globally.
She uses the platform to remind its 8,000 subscribers that if ‘they’re having a little itch, they can go to the app and listen to a song or a video or a podcast’
She also uses the app to send ‘encouraging messages,’ provide resources, and host virtual events
Though she is a Christian, Shakia said her decision to remain abstinent wasn’t rooted in religion. She said: ‘Seeing how casual sex was happening, it was nothing I desired’
‘We literally have people from all over the world that will stay up for the events. Some people will get up at four in the morning just to get on,’ she said.
‘Africa, the UK, India, Australia – I’ve shipped out to Ireland and Israel. All over, people are tapping in whether it’s on the app, via the store, or even a YouTube channel.’
Though she is a Christian, Shakia said her decision to remain abstinent wasn’t rooted in religion.
‘Even though I’m a Christian, my “why” wasn’t initially rooted in God, but it’s matured more over the years and God now is a part of that foundation,’ she said.
‘I can remember as early as 13 making the decision. I don’t know why I made that decision at 13, but as I got older, seeing how casual sex was happening, it was nothing I desired.
‘It didn’t look super special and fun. The right person is a man that stands before me, God.’
Shakia also said that the app isn’t exclusively for Christians, and that she wants people to know that everyone is welcome.
‘Some people ask, “Is it a Christian app?” It’s not a Christian app. “I’m not a virgin can I join?” Absolutely,’ she said.
‘All are welcome. I didn’t create it only for Christians, I created it for anyone who’s living this lifestyle.’
Shakira also likes to post videos about her lifestyle online, and although she’s gotten no negative feedback about the app, she said people do react negatively to the clips.
‘I do get backlash from videos I make, especially about me being a virgin,’ she said.
‘Which blows my mind because if you watch any of my videos. I tell people I’m not here to convince, condemn or convict. I’m just sharing my truth.
‘I’m literally just saying a fact that’s true to me, but somehow people are saying I’m imposing my beliefs on other people or I’m shaming people who are non-virgins.’
She also said that the app isn’t exclusively for Christians, and that she wants people to know that everyone is welcome. ‘I created it for anyone who’s living this lifestyle,’ she added
Shakia explained that her goal is to ‘stand as the voice and let people know that there is an option.’ She said: ‘the time that we’re living in there’s only one option being pushed and it’s sex’
Shakia insisted she isn’t there to judge but to ‘stand as the voice and face and let people know that there is an option.’
‘I feel like in order to make an informed decision with anything you have to be informed of all the options and I think the time that we’re living in there’s only one option being pushed and it’s sex,’ she said.
‘If people choose to do that, I don’t have anything to say about it, I just think we’re doing a disservice to the youth.
‘When I was 13, I needed to know that living an abstinent lifestyle is doable and it’s being done.
‘A lot of youth will reach out to me and ask me, “Can I wait?” and that blows my mind that they think that’s something they have to ask.
‘I just love being able to allow people to see that there is a different option and really give a new face and voice to what it’s like to live abstinent.
‘People think they know what a virgin looks or acts like, so just showing them that we’re out here and we’re cute and we’re living and we’re fun, but we just made a decision in regard to our sexuality.”